Ok...sharks eat us sometimes.
That sucks...I mean, like, royally sucks. However, what would the ocean be without these ravenous creatures cleaning up all the debris? I remember asking my parents when I was a little girl why God made sharks when all they seemed to do was nom, nom, nom on innocent people and sea life all day. My mother described sharks as a sort of garbage disposal for the ocean--if it weren't for these cartilaginous creatures, the ocean would be so dirty, we may not even be able to swim in it without crustaceous carcasses interrupting our splashy fun.
She didn't add the part about carcasses but it was basically implied. You see, the ocean is basically a shark's house and we're just living in it. Why, then, do cinematic hits like Jaws insist on slandering this species?
"You're gonna need a bigger boat..." Well maybe you're gonna need to come up with a hobby that doesn't involve going out into the ocean and provoking a shark that just ate a bunch of your friends...dullards...
After spending years fangirl-ing over Shark Week and being in opposition of these creatures' bad rap, I found myself swelling with elation when a pair of dancers definitively stole the 2015 Superbowl Halftime performance by dressing up as beauteous great white sharks and shaking their dorsal fins like their lives depended on it. The shark dancing on audiences' left side has now become infamously known as "Left Shark" due to his particularly off-kilter and seemingly un-choreographed dance moves. Let's have a look-see:
The internet went ballistic--and nearly broke itself--over Left Shark's disarming awkwardness while Right Shark decided to stay true to whatever the heck they were told to do in rehearsals.
After less than a week of viral fame, however, The Hollywood Reporter revealed that those clumsy moves were actually right on point with what the dancer had been instructed to do.
"The sharks were given two main objectives," Perry's choreographer RJ Durell tells THR."One, perform Katy’s trademark moves to the 'Teenage Dream' chorus, which they both did perfectly; and two, to have loads of fun, and bring to life these characters in a cartoon manner, giving them a Tweedledee/Tweedledum-type persona."
"Clearly, that was portrayed with the overzealous shark on the right hitting precise dance moves, while the left shark," Durell says, "was playing up the more goofy, fun-spirited sports-fan mascot type, who was just happy to be at the Super Bowl."
On the heels of this revelation, US Weekly reported today that both sharks had revealed themselves via Instagram. Right Shark is dancer Scott Myrick, the same dancer that allegedly sparked a feud between Perry and Taylor Swift (I still say that so-called feud is a publicity stunt, but whatevs...if I can make enough in album sales to buy five yachts I'll publicly feud with whoever you throw at me). Left Shark has been revealed as dancer Bryan Gaw, and I've decided to follow in the footsteps of thousands of others and follow Gaw on his Instagram and Twitter. Feel free to follow Right Shark on his Instagram and Twitter as well...his moves were pretty sweet.
But really, who cares if Left Shark's dance moves were the product of direction or a simple guffaw? That shark's exuberant gambol epitomizes the old adage, "dance like no one is watching." His carefree oscillations remind us all to revel in each moment and to shed the anxieties and trepidation that so oft suppress our authentic selves.
God bless you, Left Shark. You are a hero amongst women, men, and sea creatures everywhere.
Keep dancing!
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